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Due to lack of activity I have chosen to close this forum thank-you for the ride it was a blast when it was here. DreamHrt

 

 blueyedsongstress

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blueyedsongstress

blueyedsongstress


Female
Number of posts : 104
Age : 66
Location : southern california
Registration date : 2007-09-16

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PostSubject: blueyedsongstress   blueyedsongstress Icon_minitimeWed Apr 30, 2008 8:01 pm

Wow...let's see if I can encapsulate my life into a post that won't take someone FOREVER to read LOL !

I was born on Feb 25, 1958 making me a newbie to the 50+ crowd! I was born in Brooklyn N.Y. and am the 6th of 7 children , however my oldest brother James and younger sister JeanMarie died shortly after birth. My family moved to So. Cal in 1961 and we lived in our 1st house for almost 5 yrs and then moved into the home we still have in 1965. I am so glad to be able to say that I only went to one elementary school, one jr. high school and one high school (so many have had to move constantly)

I survived a sexual assault at the age of 17. I am not too embarrased to say that I am so thankful that man was not able to take my virginity.


I was fortunate to inherite my father's artistic abilities (as did my brothers and sisters and my sons!) I enjoyed drawing and eventually started doing face painting and wood crafting in my adult hood.

I have 3 children : Dustin 24, Brody 15 and McKenna 13. I have a daughter in law Lisa and 2 step granddaughters Nicole 8 and Taylor 4

I have always loved to sing, although I did not have the confidence in myself when I was younger and did not persue it (my biggest regret in life) Over the years I started singing with my sister Judy at our local Karaoke bars and she eventually started KJ ing for her work. I have been approached by people saying I should be recording...but you know that money speaks louder that words so unless someone was going to back me financially...it wasn't going to happen! One time my sister and I entered a contest ...we were the only entry who sang in harmony and we weren't told that they didn't provide any music (it was supposed to be a Christmas karaoke event) so we actually sang it (Winter Wonderland ) acapella. We got an honorable mention. Although we weren't upset that we didn't win...we were surprised because we knew we were better than most, if not all , of the other entries (believe me I do not brag as a habit) shortly after they announced the winners...one of the judges (a radio dj) came up to us and said.."I'm sorry that we couldn't let you win since you are professionals" .....WHAT?! we started laughing and said we were not professionals . She was sure she had seen us perform somewhere!!!

Anyway...on with my life in a nutshell.

I have been married twice (both ended up being abusive ) the second one ended up stabbing my now 15 yr old son while he and his sister were on a court ordered visit (she saved him from being stabbed a second time by throwing a frozen drink at their father). He hid out for 3 months. Then I found him (because he's that stupid) and he got sentenced to prison (but certainly not long enough for me and my family!)
I am moving on in life but still constantly look over my shoulder ...guess I always will .

I lost my brother Tom to lung cancer...then 4 yrs later my father to the same. 1 yr before losing dad I was diagnosed with breast cancer and underwent a dbl mastectomy. I just hit the 3 yr mark this month (same month as dad's birthday and anniv of his death) It has been quite a struggle for me both financially and emotionally. I have many medical issues that combined, makes life a constant challenge for me (that's another soap opera in itself!! But it is what keeps me from continuing my facepainting and craftwork) I do still sing. It keeps me distracted from other issues.
I am awaiting an appeal for social security at this time. I am not surprised to be denied. My friend was waiting for a liver and was denied up until 3 mos before he died. SUCKS.

So...I am a survivor... well, a recovering survivor ...cause it is an everyday battle.
I am attaching a collage picture of family. sorry I don't have pics of my new daughter in law or my bird (white dove -- Volare) Oh...p.s. Brody , my little rebel...no longer has that mohawk! hurray!!! I think I have managed to fill you in on my not so exciting life....till there is more to tell....blueyedsongstress 817441 blueyedsongstress FamilycollageI
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DreamHrt
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Female
Number of posts : 4528
Age : 59
Registration date : 2007-08-06

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PostSubject: Re: blueyedsongstress   blueyedsongstress Icon_minitimeWed Apr 30, 2008 8:14 pm

Wow I am beginning to think we were all brought together for a reason. Seems everyone has a tragic story to tell in there lives.
I am so sorry to hear about all that has happened to you and your son! I am surprised mom isnt up for murder (joke) I can't say I wouldnt have gone after the SOB.
I guess even thought you like men, you can relate to why I am not with one lol
I am thankful your strong enough to endure all this. I pray things look up for you.
As for disability.. shoot. I tried eight yes that is 8 times before finally being accepted last year. I have had three breakdowns in my life and have been hospitalised for two of them because I became so depressed all I wanted to do was die.
Yet disability until last year.. said I was fine....
My son who has almost died from Crohns several times and still is very sick.. even got denied.
Keep fighting it!!!
many hugs!
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wietzema
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wietzema


Female
Number of posts : 2341
Age : 69
Location : South Dakota
Registration date : 2007-08-15

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PostSubject: Re: blueyedsongstress   blueyedsongstress Icon_minitimeWed Apr 30, 2008 8:33 pm

OMG Blue, How awful to have your son stabbed and by his father, How awful,. You have had a rough life but like I said before I think our past life's make us look more to the future and appreciate what we have and what we've had to go through to get where we are,. You have a beautiful family and do you mind me asking where you are from? The reason I ask is that your son's younger picture looks a lot like my nephew Johnny and your dad and brother both look like some one I know or knew, and after looking at your picture again you do as well. just can not put my finger on who or where. I'm glad that you came to Jodi's board, it's been a pleasure to get to know you as it has been to get to know all the friends here at THE REAL DEAL FORUM....
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blueyedsongstress

blueyedsongstress


Female
Number of posts : 104
Age : 66
Location : southern california
Registration date : 2007-09-16

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PostSubject: Re: blueyedsongstress   blueyedsongstress Icon_minitimeWed Apr 30, 2008 11:40 pm

Dream: Believe me I have thought about "murder" over the years. I too deal with depression...although one of the s.s. docs complaints is that I am not on meds. I do NOT want to go that route...same with pain meds. I resist them every step of the way. I honestly don't know what keeps me from losing it at times.....is it an inner strength that I do not recognize?or is it my "karma" to endure the suffering. (don't get me wrong ...I am not saying that losing it would be an purposeful escape, since I have never had a breakdown I wouldn't know how to describe it. So being ingnorant to it....it sometimes sounds like it would be a better place to be for awhile. Know what I mean?)

I live for my children.
and as far as myself....my only wish is that they and I, outlive the ex!
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blueyedsongstress

blueyedsongstress


Female
Number of posts : 104
Age : 66
Location : southern california
Registration date : 2007-09-16

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PostSubject: Re: blueyedsongstress   blueyedsongstress Icon_minitimeWed Apr 30, 2008 11:40 pm

w: sending you a private mess.
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DreamHrt
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Female
Number of posts : 4528
Age : 59
Registration date : 2007-08-06

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PostSubject: Re: blueyedsongstress   blueyedsongstress Icon_minitimeThu May 01, 2008 12:02 am

having a breakdown, at least for me, was horrific. This last time, I was put in the mental hospital. Where the food was nasty and the doors were locked and you couldnt even open a window. There were only cig breaks every 2 hrs then they stopped at ten pm. I was surounded by real nut jobs lol
I was in there for five days. I couldnt think. I had not slept in 3 days and all I could do was cry. It was the meds they gave me that put me in lala land so I could "exscape".
However now that I am home. Those meds are only a luxury. I refuse to comprimise myself to allow less of me for the kids.
So I take what I have to and try to deal...
I totally understand you
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wietzema
Super Mod
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wietzema


Female
Number of posts : 2341
Age : 69
Location : South Dakota
Registration date : 2007-08-15

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PostSubject: Re: blueyedsongstress   blueyedsongstress Icon_minitimeThu May 01, 2008 10:25 am

Wow Jodi, windows that don't open locked doors I'd GO NUTS.. I can not handle that not even a little drives me nuts just thinking about it. I know those places serve a purpose for some but wow is depression on of them?? I find myself getting depressed at times but I think of what would my family do with out me and it does help some but thank GOD I don't get that way to often, not to much really bothers me, theres always tomorrow, But of course I've been lucker than most in a lot of ways too..
My heart goes out to both you and Blue for hte hell you've had to endure...

blueyedsongstress Thheart
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tygrlllie
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tygrlllie


Female
Number of posts : 2330
Age : 49
Registration date : 2007-08-15

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PostSubject: Re: blueyedsongstress   blueyedsongstress Icon_minitimeFri May 02, 2008 7:37 am

I tell people all the time I stay alive just to P*** people off. I think it's working. I'll get to writing mine today, so you'll get a peek into my brain. Be careful - dark and cobwebby in there. Bring a flashlight.
~tyg
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blueyedsongstress

blueyedsongstress


Female
Number of posts : 104
Age : 66
Location : southern california
Registration date : 2007-09-16

blueyedsongstress Empty
PostSubject: Re: blueyedsongstress   blueyedsongstress Icon_minitimeFri May 02, 2008 10:01 am

yeah Ty....can't wait to see what lurks in the shadows and darkness!!! LOL!

for me: I just want to outlive the ex.
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PostSubject: Re: blueyedsongstress   blueyedsongstress Icon_minitime

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