I need your strrength, please!

Hi everyone,

I feel sort of embarassed asking for your prayers but right now I really do need the strength of the love and sisterhood I have with you guys.
In my fifty-four years of life I have prided myself in never....NEVER....hating anyone. I've hated ideas, songs, movies...ect, ect. (you get the idea) But never hated a person. UNTIL NOW!! Let me explain.

Tuesday I went to babysit for Jennifer. I was excited and it had been an all around good day because it was my dad's birthday. Jennifer picked me up and we started catching up on what she was doing lately. Then she sprung some horrible news on me. My son had been arrested and his ex-girlfriend was behind it. As of right now I don't know any of the details but Jennifer told me a Sheriff's deputy showed up at her apartment, handcuffed John and hauled him off to jail. Jennifer also informed me John's ex-girlfriend was sending text messages out to her and to his cousin, Troy, bragging about the fact that she got John arrested.

Mind you, I have had very little respect for this girl because of alot of the shit she has pulled on John but this stunt pretty much broke the camel's back. Once the shock of it all wore off I spent the better part of Wednesday seething in hate for Kim (the ex). I'm not going to confront her about her actions because I know I will haul off and smack the living shit out of her for what she's done. And the last thing I or anyone else in my family needs is for me to end up in jail too.

So...I guess, basically, I'm asking for you all to prayer for me and for my son. Pray that I find the strength to overcome this hideous emotion because quite frankly.....it's festering deep inside my very soul. Please pray that John will not lose his job so he can continue to support his two adorable children. That he will find some way to win out over this horrible, horrible nightmare Kim has put him through over the last three years.

I'm sorry ladies for sounding so selfish to ask for prayers for myself. I've always been the one to help you guys out when you needed an extra prayer. But now honestly....I don't know where else to go or who to turn to. So here I am, swallowing my pride and asking for help. If you have anything left on your prayer line, please include me. I pray I can get over this seething hatred of Kim, that I can find some way to help John and do whatever needs to be done to solve this. Especially for Hailey and Joshua, John's two little ones.

With all my heart......Thank you,
Denise

Darlin never feel bad for asking for help, or prayers for that matter....you need not feel guilty...you are praying for strength and that is nothing to feel bad about...we are all here for you, just like you are here for us.
You always have the Love and support of your gurls!
I pray for you and your son..but I also pray that this woman sees the hurt she is inflicting on John and those that love him and will drop it all and let him be.

I pray for your strength and that your love and faith will guide you through this, without comprimising that which makes you, YOU!

I love you Gurl...be strong!!!

You of all people need many prayers for many reasons. Asking is part of the gift that God gave us hon...
Now if ya dont mind what did she get him arrested for? Can he fight it? I know exacally what you mean about always trying to understand others and never hateing anyone then BOOM you just cant get that certain someone off of your hate mail list.... I feel that way about the kids dad. he didnt even call them for thanksgiving and we havent seen money from him in over a month.. we had to get help from an org to get food..
ANYWAY...
Hon I always pray for you.. this time I will add a special one for your son.. oh and should I pray ya dont smack the bitch and get in trouble to?.. lol
love you girl

Gee I am so sorry to hear this news. I will pray for you and your son for sure. We are going through sort of the same dilemna with my son-in-law John who is in jail also for a crime he did not commit however his ex-wife is going for blood on this one. Should he get convicted he will spend the rest of his life in jail. My daughter is so upset about this because John is not with her and of course they do have a son together that may never get to really know his dad.

Hate is a strong word and I think you know that you are entitled to it because of the situation that girl has put your son in. However, try to stay positive and with hope and our prayers things will get better.

Take care my friend!

gesh these exs make mine sound sweet...

concertcris wrote:

Hate is a strong word and I think you know that you are entitled to it because of the situation that girl has put your son in. However, try to stay positive and with hope and our prayers things will get better.

Take care my friend!

You may be entiltled to it however whenever you hate it holds you in bondage NOT the person you are hating.

ROFLOL.....Jodie, you might just have to do that. If I ever come face to face with her the temptation to slap the bitch might be more than I can handle.

I agree with your statement Mae but sometimes the emotion makes me feel things I need to feel so I can unleashed them, let them go. If I hold it in or try re-directing it.....it could possibly blow up in my face. It's happened before with anger. That's why I work very, very hard at controlling my anger.


Most of all.....THANK YOU!!! It's so heart warming to know there are people who care. I was in tears when I posted this. The frustration, anger, diappointment.....these emotions have got me distracted to the point I can't think sometimes. I really, really want to pack it up and leave. Go somewhere....ANYWHERE!!!! Fresh start, new life. But I know I can't. I can't run away as much as I want to. I have to do what I've always done in the past. Turn and face the problem like a big girl. And hope like hell it doesn't defeat me or John in the process.

Denise,
Don't waste your energy hating. Sounds lioke what she needs is pity. It takes a pitiful person to do something like this b*tch did. Focus on those grandkids they need your attent more than she does. Just my

Sis -
So, I'm late to the party - what else is new, right? Anyway, of course we're praying, and you shouldn't be embarassed for asking for what you need. You should be embarassed for NOT asking for what you need. And Mae has a hell of a point - by focussing your hate on Kim (though warranted), you are focussing much needed energies where they don't need to be. As they say, let go and let God. Let go of the control issues and let God take care of it. That's his job. To take care of the things we can't.
Father,
I offer up my beloved heart sister Denise to you today. May Your Peace and Harmony fall upon and through her until she feels Strong and Capable. I offer you John. I ask that Wisdom and Relience lend him Your Strength. I offer you Denise's parents and family, with hope that Your Guidance be their touchstone. I offer you Joshua and Hailey. I ask that You shelter them from their mother's pain that causes her to lash out like she does. And Father, I offer you Kim. May you pull away the blinders from her eyes and let her See through Yours the anguish she is helping put all these people around her through. Lend her your Maturity, so that she might feel Shame and have a Conviction of Conscience to do what is right. I offer you the local law, in hopes that your sense of Justice be acted upon through them all.
In the Name of The Lamb,
Amen.

Be tough, kiddo. We love you.
~tyg

Thanks girls!

Your right, of course. And it's not like I can't do it. Like I've said before....I've never hated anyone. So with that in mind, I turn my attention to more important matters. My family, my grandchildren and my friends (who I love very much). She isn't worth it. And I do hope and pray some day she sees what a good thing she had having John in her life. But she chose to throw it away. Her loss!

That's right Baby, You hold onto that!

I know your faith and strength will see you through thi,s and you will be able to focus on what you need to do.
We are here is you need to talk, vent or pray...all you got to do is whistle and we will all be there!
Love you Gurl!

My heart is so full of love for you guys. I feel like I could burst. Thank you, thank you, thank you all for the tremendous support. The out-pouring support and love is the strength I needed to see myself through this horrible situation. My friend, Brad said to look at the positive side of it. John is still alive...AND...this whole thing with Kim could have been alot worse.

So, with that in mind, I've decided (with all your suggestions) to move on. The Lord has brought me through much more than this so I think I can handle it. Maybe, just maybe something good will come out of it. You never know.

To each of you...Jodie, Veronica, Tyg, Renee, Crystal and Mae....what would I do without you? I would not want to know.

With much love, hugs and kisses
Your sister and friend,
Denise

Just wanted to update everyone:
I was able to talk to John via the phone two days ago. He is required to serve jail time for 30 days because of probation violations. Howevver, he's in good spirits despite the situation, thinking positively. Yay! He goes to court on Friday, Dec. 4th and they will decide what to do then. I'm hoping for the best that he will be released around Christmas day.

Again, thank you all for your love and support. It helped me focus on being the better person and not letting my "dislike" of Kim get the better of me. Your the best friends/sisters I could ever have. I love you!!!

Denise

I will pray he will be home for christmas.. I really hope he isnt a smoker... i know many a smoker that said having to quit was worse then doing time

LOL
It's so funny you mention that Jodie. The last time I talked to John he said the first thing he's going to do when he gets home is smoke a cigarette. I had to laugh.

Denise, I feel so bad that I didn't see your post and wasn't here to support you. I will definitely keep you and your family in my prayers and hope things go well for your son today and he can be home for the holidays. Take care,hon. Loveyou.

Thank you Connie. Trust me, it's not too late for a prayer or two. John is trying very hard to look at the positive side to all of this as I am too. All I can do is pray this situation will help him turn his life around when he does come home.